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Awards season

on June 5, 2012

I am not a braggy parent. I am, of course, extremely proud of my kids’ accomplishments, but have little need to brag to other parents. I do share with grandparents their various accomplishments, but have little need to tell everyone.

It’s awards season, which means Facebook post after Facebook post where parents brag about the things their kids have done. Frankly, I think it’s great that your kid got a 4.0 in 4th grade, but it doesn’t tell me that your child is brilliant or on his or her way to MIT. It tells me that 4th grade (and c’mon, it’s 4TH grade!) wasn’t a huge challenge, or that the teacher was an easy grader (yes, those exist) or something else.

I’m much more interested in hearing about the things kids DO, and not what they do better than everyone else. I think that my generation in particular is extremely bragadocious. Why is that? I haven’t a clue, but I imagine it has something to do with some insecurities that must have manifested themselves as we grew up in the 1980s.

Sometimes I worry that by not standing around bragging about my kids (both of whom are always honor roll and who test off the chart) they get overlooked. But then I realize and understand that the way I work is I’d rather my kids get credit where credit is due, from their own efforts and in all due time. They are quiet, hard workers who always land at the top of the heap, sometimes to the astonishment of their teachers, who didn’t see them coming.

So to the parent who told me today (without any prompting on my part and with whom I wasn’t even having a conversation) that her daughter nearly got 4.0 all through 4th and 5th grade except for one B, I say I’d rather you brag about her generous nature or her loving spirit. A brain without a heart is irrelevant and if she’s that brilliant (aren’t they all) then it will show itself in due time. You don’t have to tell me about it.



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